G.I. Joe: Retaliation pushed back to 2013

Dreams dreams nightmare dreams

All of my (college) roommates know how weird my dreams can get. But honestly, frequent instances of me waking up and seeing images of pyramids, vines and watching them fade away (which also mark the transitions from my dream to reality), are weirder. And speaking of weird, I warn you, this post can be as weird as I can get. So if you’re not up for it, you’re free to ignore this post.

I love dreaming, tulog man o gising. My favourite type of dream is lucid dreaming, the one where you are aware that you are in a dream and you have the power to control it. But what I hate most is false awakening, when you dream about waking up from a dream, and most of the time when this happens, my happy lucid dreams end up in nightmares :( 

Last Tuesday night was my latest lucid dream, and yes, it ended badly. I dreamt I was already working, assigned for a field work somewhere in a congested area in Manila. There were lots of houses, and I found myself talking to a colleague in front of a house. Just a few seconds later three men approached us, said “Hindi mo ibibigay?” and just stabbed me in the stomach. I didn’t feel anything at first, until I saw blood trickle out of the wounds, then I felt pain. I was still rationalising whether I was in a dream or reality, but when I started feeling paralysed, my mind gave up and I believed it was really happening. The man who stabbed me dragged me into the darker parts of the streets, and I actually thought I was going to die. My mind was already crippling me with thoughts of how he would torture me to death, when I started to hear a screeching sound so loud it finally woke me up. Thanks to our neighbour’s 8AM house renovation, I got back into reality.

That dream made me realise I never really gave dying a thought. I never really imagined how I could die a tragic, painful, tormenting, agonizing death. I always thought I would die because of a terminal illness, and that usually gives a person time to accept that he or she would die, time to understand, time to say goodbye. Moreover, I also realised, I still am not ready to die.

We’ll never know what would happen to us, when we would crossover from this reality to the life hereafter. I took comfort in the truth that I know I’ll be with Him any time He decides my time here on earth is finally over. Why? Because Jesus is my Lord, because He saved me by grace, and I chose Him by faith. But still, I pray that when that time happens, I’ll have the gift of time to prepare not only myself, but mostly the ones I’ll leave behind. 

Dreaming is a gift we should enjoy, and I hope when you dream, you dream of happy things. Nightmares are inevitable, but do everything not to let them crossover to your reality. But do know, that every nightmare has an end. Just have the courage and the strength to fight through it and get back up into reality (and catch your breath pagkagising =p). 

I used to have a lot of nightmares, but by God’s grace, my bad dreams are getting fewer and fewer. There were times when my dreams could get as lucid as reality, and there are times when I can’t remember them at all. I’m pretty sure everyone goes through that as well. But I am just as grateful for dreaming happier things lately :) I’m sorry if this post made you feel bad, or worse, or realised that I am weird, even crazy. Haha. But yeah, I just have to vent this out, otherwise I’d get crazier. Until then, dear friend, dream happy dreams :)

<3 eula

Lucid Dreaming: http://www.dreamviews.com/content/what-lucid-dreaming-16/

False Awakening: http://www.dreamviews.com/content/staying-lucid-26/

Of poems and crazy buddies

“Umuulan nanaman,

at ang bawat patak, 

Lumulunod sa mga pangarap

na matagal nang pinakawalan…. “

Okay, so ako na ang try-hard manunula. Or poet. Haha.

So the other night I was talking to my good old friend slash brotha from another motha Yogi Boar, and we found out that we both end up writing words in rhymes aka songs (for him) and poems (for me, and maybe for him as well) at random times and random places. Or sometimes hindi naman rhyme, but gets, just randomly writing something….. poetic? Artistic?

It’s just feels good to be able express what you feel in cryptic messages. He he. Well I do that all the time. You know, writing how or what you feel without explicitly stating what you really feel. 

Quoting Yogs, if the successful people do it, no matter how weird, no matter how “ANO DAW YON” the lines are, they’re called artistic. If you’re a nobody and you just keep writing poems, no matter how theoretically-grounded it may be, no matter how “WOW ASTIG NAMAN YAN BRO” your works may be, you’re called CRAZY.

So, yeah. Hahaha. I’m just so happy I’m surrounded by people who love and accept me no matter what :))) Above all, I still thank God for giving me this ability to express things in uhm, alternative ways(?), I hope I use it someday effectively for Him :)

4 days

Last May 4 to 7, I spent 4 amazing days with roughly 360 amazing people at Rizal Re-Creation Center. It was my second time to attend a youth camp, and my first time to lead a d-group. I must say it wasn’t an easy task, but by God’s grace, everything went well. He pulled us through, and we all made new friends and met amazing peeeople. I just pray for everything to go well according to His plans with the lives and hearts that He touched :)

It was a different experience. Totoo ngang nakakakilig kapag super close kayo ni God, kapag sigurado ka na you feel His presence. And I thank Him because even after all these years, He never deprived me of the many chances He gave me to genuinely experience and accept His love (kahit napaka-pasaway ko sobra).This whole experience is so long I neeeeed a separate entry for it. Pero in the future na. Haha. Meanwhile, here are some photos I grabbed from J-zone Alabang’s official Facebook page here:

https://www.facebook.com/Jzonealabang :)

The winning team! Haha. D-group of Les, Eula, and Rovs. Photo grabbed from Rovs Bulandos :)

J-zone Alabang d-group leaders <3

My gehls (from left to right clockwise): Amanda, Cj, Hannah, Ana, Kristel, Elaine, Camille, Moi.

Excited to see more of my gehls and the rest of the camp attendees in J-zone Elevate! And you, dear reader, are most welcome to come and visit us every Saturday, 4 to 6PM at the Main Worship Hall, 4th floor of CCF Alabang, Madrigal Business Park. Youknowyouwantto <3